Life in Contrast
- April M. Steele
- Sep 3, 2017
- 3 min read
I live and work in two different worlds. Monday through Friday, I drive from Jefferson County, MO to East St. Louis, IL for work and back again.
To get an idea of how crazy East St. Louis, Illinois can be, check out my post "One of a Kind Workplace" for some one of a kind stories.
If you're not familiar with Jefferson County, Missouri, however...I can tell you that it is mostly comprised of white people (also known as crackers. I can say that because names towards white people aren't racist ya know ) and is known as the Meth County of America. I'm not particularly proud of that description, but what I call home does have more perks than not. It has good schools, mostly polite people, and beautiful landscapes.
They are certainly on two opposite sides of culture in such a way that it makes me chuckle every time I think about it. I thought about how many hilarious things I see at work and I imagine how they would cause completely different reactions in redneck central.
Because only in East St. Louis is it okay to
Walk down the street at 7:30 in the morning while cracking open a giant beer
Because in East St. Louis .. what else are you supposed to drink?
In Jefferson County.......a cop car follows you at a distance and people later read about you being publicly intoxicated in the local newspaper
Wear chocolate colored stretch pants
Because in East St. Louis...... your big ass is hot lookin like you ain't got no pants on
In Jefferson County.... You have to wonder if that chic knows we can still see her shit stains
Start a brush fire in middle of the street
Because in East St. Louis.... you just drive around him cussing, but don't look him in the eye
In Jefferson County.... it was probably an accident when that drunk guy on his bike ran into the tree and his mobile meth lab exploded
Have an M. C. Hammer hair cut and pants
Because in East St. Louis.... that's tight dawg
In Jefferson County...... it's Halloween 1989
Give free fried chicken as a car wash incentive
Because in East St. Louis...... cars are spilling out of the parking lot into the street
In Jefferson County..... you just keep on driving, fried chicken is most likely code for when Big Tom drives by
Bring your barefoot kids into a business office lobby and let them literally hang from the bulletin boards
Because in East St. Louis...... at least they all have pants
In Jefferson County..... you assume those children were born addicted to meth and only own one shoe
Cut your lawn with a chainsaw
Because in East St. Louis.....that's just adaptability
In Jefferson County...... ol' Bill's at it again
Ride your bike down the sidewalk wearing a full size wall clock around your neck
Because in East St. Louis....... he's an amateur rapper riding down to the club for his first show
In Jefferson County....... dude just finished breaking into a house and ran out of space in his back pack for shit to pawn
Walk into a Property Management office wearing absolutely no pants or underwear
Because in East St. Louis...... you assume he escaped from the mental home down the street and turn your head away from the surveillance camera
In Jefferson County..... call the cops while Pa gets his shotgun from out from under the desk
Stand in middle of a room with a bucket of chicken wings and share with random people in a circle as they come in, thus creating a chicken party
Because in East St. Louis..... this is the most peaceful you've seen it in a long time
In Jefferson County..... that's George's Sunday wedding ceremony
And that is what I call, my life in contrast
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